Pretence
by LittleEagle22
Summary: She needed a distraction. He needed a way out. Together, they needed to show the world that their relationship was perfect...even if it wasn't exactly real.
1. And Away We Go

Whistling merrily, Draco Malfoy strolled through the busy hallway of the American Ministry of Magic. He felt eyes on him with every step he took and revelled in the attention. It seemed every woman he passed couldn't help but take a glance or two at the blond; and with good reason.

Gone was the lanky sixteen year old with perfectly coifed hair and an all-black ensemble. In his place stood a sharply dressed twenty-four year old man, lean but with an athletic physique as a result of his weekly Quidditch games with the lads and daily workout sessions with his partner. His hair, no longer smoothed back, was mussed stylishly to give him a carefree appearance.

Winking at an attractive blonde gawking at him, Draco got a good laugh at seeing the poised woman lose her cool and trip, scattering all the files in her arms and spilling her coffee on top of them for good measure.

A sigh at his side made his laughs grow in volume, as he shot a cheeky grin at his partner as if to say 'I can't help that I'm so attractive.' Getting a scowl and shake of the head in return, Draco smirked. It was so easy getting to her.

Who was she? Hermione Granger, one third of the Golden Trio, muggleborn extraordinaire...and his partner of five years at the Department of International Magic Cooperation. It came as quite a shock to everyone in the department, including the dumb duo that was Potty and the Weasel when they got wind of it, that he was announced as her partner. It was even more of a shock when he and the brunette firecracker calmly greeted one another and shook hands before turning their attention to their department head to receive their first assignment.

Childhood rivalries aside, the two made quite a team together. Harold Garret, head of the department, was smug as he took full credit for their pairing. Over the years, they'd come close to becoming friends; though both would vehemently deny it. Much as Draco enjoyed their partnership, daily spats, and even their rare one-on-one talks, he still couldn't stand her enough to want to hang around her beyond their job. The feeling, she'd always reply, was mutual.

Time had been very kind to Hermione Granger. Her once untameable hair had remained voluminous but was not characterized by long, smooth, curls no man could resist wanting to run his hands through. Her doe eyes remained as fiery but as kind as every; something he was secretly thankful for. And her physique...well, let's just say that even he couldn't stop himself from ogling her every day. Especially in the tiny scraps of clothes she called her 'workout outfit.' Seeing how uncomfortable it had made her the first time he did it, he took to raking his eyes over her body and making a remark at how she looked at least once a day to rile her up. She looked even hotter when angered so it was a win-win situation for Draco.

Unfortunately for him, her know-it-all persona and bossiness only got stronger over time as well. The second she opened her mouth to berate him over something trivial like not having his paperwork completed, or lecture him on why he should not be scaring the interns until he'd made at least one cry every day, he felt like turning his wand on himself.

"Would you please kindly refrain from trying to flirt with everyone with a pulse around you? We're here to do our job, not for you to score with another bimbo that's ready to fall into your bed."

Ah, there she was. She'd been oddly quiet the entire day, something that had irritated the blond greatly. Draco liked routine, and part of his routine was hearing her whine, lecture and/or scold him within the first ten minutes of their work day; every day. He'd tried everything to get her to perk up or yell at him all day, but hadn't succeeded. Until now, that is. He knew she couldn't resist taking a jab at his dating life.

"No need to worry and be jealous, Granger. I'm all yours babe," he replied with a lecherous smirk on his face. She only scoffed and sped past him in a huff. The smirk widened as his eyes were zeroed in on her behind as her hips swayed in front of him. Did he mention he loved seeing her in a skirt?

Increasing his pace, he quickly made it back to her side as the door at the end of the floor opened for them. Striding purposefully inside, the duo was met with Gerald Whitehall; the American Minister of Magic.

"Ms. Granger, it's a pleasure to finally meet you," the man drawled and, without taking his eyes off of the witch standing between them, extended a brief "you too, Mr. Malfoy" in his direction.

Not yet one minute and Draco already hated Whitehall; and by the way his partner stiffened as the slimy octogenarian sided up to her and took a couple of steps backward until she bumped into him had him thinking she felt the same. Draco could already feel their magic crackling angrily at the sight of the old man leering at her so freely; hers for feeling objectified yet again – something, she made sure to remind him of an infinite number of times a week, she absolutely hated about this job – and his because...well, because only he was allowed to look at her like that. It was _their_ thing. And maybe, he had grown to be slightly protective of his partner. Mostly just the former.

Moving so he was slightly in front of her, Draco extended his hand to clasp the one Whitehall had been reaching towards Hermione and made sure to squeeze it in warning. He could tell the old man was put off, but shook his hand nonetheless before reaching for the silently fuming brunette once again. She briefly shook the man's hand before letting go and discreetly wiping her hand along her skirt. Draco stifled a laugh and she pinched him in return.

"Please, take a seat and we'll go over the details of the trade together." He motioned them to the chairs in front of the large desk by the wall-to-wall window. Placing his hand on the small of her back, Draco guided Hermione over to one of the chairs quickly before Whitehall could finish asking if he could escort her there.

Taking a seat to her left, Draco motioned for the witch beside him start the discussion. They had a system that worked quite well for them. She used her gift of gab and overly large brain to talk circles around whoever they were dealing with and he stepped in using what his pureblood upbringing and his father had taught him about dealing with the politics of the Ministry to finish the job to get them exactly what they wanted. Before she could open her mouth, Whitehall interrupted.

"Would you like some tea, Ms. Granger? Perhaps some coffee? Chocolate? Anything you wan–"

"No thank you Mr. Whitehall, _we're_ alright for now," she replied and stressed 'we' so the old fart would get the message.

"Ah, of course this extends to you too, Mr. Malfoy. I was merely doing my gentlemanly duty and asking the lovely lady first," Whitehall tried suavely to placate the clearly displeased Hermione.

A heel pressing down on his own shiny loafers silenced him from making a scathing remark. She knew him quite well by now. 'She'll be paying for a new pair if she so much as smudged my favourite shoes.'

"Of course," was all he verbalized before Hermione steered the discussion back to their task.

* * *

"I swear, I would have hexed his arse if he winked at me or pursed his lips one more time! The nerve of that arrogant, atrocious, disgusting...ugh!"

Snickering lightly, Draco wound his arm around her to calm her down before she drew any more attention to herself. She glared heatedly as she shook his arm off before gripping her bag tighter.

"How could you not be flattered at the fact he was so clearly propositioning you?" he drawled sarcastically.

At her murderous look, he quickly added: "relax Granger! I'm sure you 'accidentally' dropping that paperweight on his hand was enough of a hint to get him to back off. Remember, only four more days until we get to head back home and we forget about Whitehall until the next time we have to deal with him."

"Thank Merlin for that," she muttered. Sensing her anger was ebbing, he tightly wound his arm around her waist and squeezed to offer some kind of comfort. Their quasi-friendship allowed for that once in a while. This time, she didn't move away. Pleased, he continued.

"Come on, chin up Granger. Don't let that old pervert get you down. Tell you what, lets go grab a couple of drinks and you can vent some more about how unfair and misogynistic the world is. My treat!" he coerced.

"You know, if you weren't offering alcohol, I would have kicked you to inflict as much damage as possible and walked away by now for that comment," came the acerbic reply as she pouted darkly and tried to weasel out of his hold.

Laughing at her poor attempts to be free of him, he only held her tighter and was about to apparate them away before a shrill voice halted him.

"DRACO? DRACO MALFOY?"

"Oh, shite! Not her, anyone but her."

"Wh–" Hermione froze mid-word, eyes wide as the woman striding towards them while teetering precariously on stiletto heels stood arms akimbo in from of the pair and nearly growled as she focused on his arm around his partner.

"Just play along," Draco managed to whisper in Hermione's ear as the woman in front of them spoke.

"Who the hell is this slut and why did you not tell me you would be in the country?' she bit out. "Five months Draco, it been over five months since you said you'd call me but never did."

"Hello Liza, good to see you again." Before she could interrupt, he opened his mouth and finished. "This 'slut,' as you so nicely pointed out, is my fiancée; Hermione Granger. Say hello to Liza, love!"

As soon as he finished speaking, Draco was on the receiving end of twin glares. Sighing, he waited for the ensuing explosion and wishing with all his might that he could somehow get his hands on a drink. He decided he needed one now more than ever.

* * *

**_Hi everyone! I'm back and ready to delve back into the wonderful world of Dramione! I'd really love to hear what you think of this story premise so far, so I can decide whether or not to continue writing it. Reviews are much appreciated! _**

**_-LittleEagle _**


	2. A Rock and a Hard Place

Gently massaging his temples, Draco silently _accioed_himself another bottle of firewhiskey and poured himself another glass as he cursed the two chortling morons rolling around on his couch. On the left, Blaise Zabini was struggling to breathe as he clutched at his stomach. On the right, Pansy Parkinson's attempts at speaking were interrupted by a myriad of giggles so she'd given up speaking altogether and kept on laughing away.

Draco was not amused. Here he thought the two would be supportive and help him through the mess he found himself in. Instead, he ended up halfway drunk and sulking like a toddler while the two idiots he called his best friends were having a good old time at his expense.

A week ago, he would have loved all the attention the media decided to bestow on him. He was quick to sour to that idea. Damn Liza, and damn his stupid plan.

* * *

_"She's your WHAT?" came the shrill shriek and Draco winced as the woman's voice drew the attention of passersby to the trio._

_"My __**fiancée**__. When did you become so hard of hearing?"_

_As he said this, Draco also took a proper look at the dumbfounded woman before him. She hadn't changed much in the months since he'd last seen her. Her long, blonde, hair was styled to perfection and her face was impressively made up to highlight the flawless features she was always quick to boast about to anyone who had the misfortune of meeting her. Her attire was the same as always: short and indecent for a serious workplace like the Ministry but made of only the most expensive material in fashion; commanding attention from anyone that glanced her way. In short, she was the American female version of him. _

_The snarl the tall woman before him let out made him want to cower behind the frowning petite woman still trapped by under his arm at his side. _

_"Where in the hell did you get a fiancée? You were with me not even five months ago." _

_Draco more so felt, rather than saw, all eyes snap towards them as the blonde banshee's voice rose in volume. He didn't need to be a seer to know this wasn't going to end well for him. The gossip would get around and this conversation, or at least a distorted version of it, was going to end up front page news. Could nothing go easy for him for once? _

_"It was eight, actually. Seems as though your memory's gone, along with your hearing," Draco sneered. _

_As Liza seethed in front of him, he continued. "As for where, Hermione and I have known each other since we were children, right love? We're working together you see, and we decided it was far past time for us to go on suppressing our feelings for each other. This one's loved me since we were thirteen –"_

_A particularly painful jab from her elbow made clear Hermione's displeasure but she wasn't speaking up yet so he took it as his cue to keep going. "And I decided not to waste any more time denying how attractive I've always found her and asked her out. And well, no surprise we were ready to be married within a few months. Isn't that right, love?" _

_Hermione's sharp nod was her only response but her blank expression and the slightly wrinkle of nose told him he was in for it the second she got him alone._

_"There is no way that this...__**this**__ is who you've decided was fit to be the next Lady Malfoy. If I know anything, it's that your father would not let someone like her get her claws into you. This filthy little bitch can't hold a candle to me or anyone in our society. Besides sweetheart, it's quite clear all she loves about you is your money. Probably can't eve-"_

_"__**Excuse me**__? Look, I don't know who you are and – to be quite frank – I could not care less. But I won't stand here while you insult me and compare me to the likes of...well, you! I'm only going to ask you once, __**sweetheart**__, to hold your tongue if you know what's good for you. I can guarantee that if you carry on, you'll not be too pleased with me."_

_Short, sweet, to the point, and threatening. Draco wasn't afraid to admit he found it hot seeing his partner verbally beating someone down. _

_"Maybe you should care. Or didn't you hear that your...fiancée," she made a face after she said the word but didn't stop talking, "was screwing __**me**__ not too long ago. You think you're good or attractive enough to hold his attention? Face the facts, __**sweetie**__, he'll drop you like a bad habit the minute the next big chest on legs walks in front of him. You're dreaming if you think he'll settle for you. In fact, I'm more than sure he's already got a little piece on the side."_

_Letting out an angry huff, Hermione removed his arm from her and stood up as tall as she could. The sight was comical, since she was nearly a head shorter than Liza, but Draco was sure now was not the time to entice her anger by laughing. He was in enough trouble with the brunette spitfire; he was not going to add to her ire. _

_"Maybe you need to face a few facts yourself __**sweetie,**__" Hermione seethed. "I don't care what you and Draco had before he and I were even together. As for him dropping me, I think I'm more than able to keep his attention...unlike you it seems. What, were you really surprised he didn't stick around after you, what is it you Yanks say, opened your legs for him. But then again, that's the only thing a two-bit whore like yourself is good at doing."_

_This time, he couldn't resist letting out a small chuckle but he was thankful both women were too preoccupied trying to kill each other with their eyes. If he didn't fear for his life – and the fact that she would make sure he couldn't have children if he tried – he would have kissed her for that gem. _

_"How dare y –?"_

_"No, I've had enough of this conversation and if I'm around you any longer, I won't be responsible for my actions. I'm tired and this encounter has been the proverbial cherry on top of the shitty desert life has decided to treat me to this week. All I have left to say to you is __**stay away from my fiancée!**__"_

_Turning to him, she finished. "I'm heading back to the hotel. Finish up here and, when you get back, we are going to have a little talk, __**love**__," she ended sarcastically. _

_Without any warning, she apparated away. Damn Granger and her temper. Did she not think through that her little plan would leave him with the woman he was trying to get away from in the first place? He had to talk to her one of these days about letting her temper get him stuck in another uncomfortable situation. He had just gotten over the nightmares from that bar in Romania. _

_"Well, as __**nice**__ as this has been, I must get going."_

_"That's it? That's all you have to say to me?"_

_"What more do you want from me? I made it perfectly clear months ago that I didn't want a relationship with you. And I made it clear that anything we had was over the night I left your flat, remember?"_

_"Draco, you kept coming back to me for two years. __**Two**__ years! Do you really expect me to believe that you've decided to settle down with that frumpy bitch after telling me for years you didn't want a relationship? Please Draco, I'm not stupid."_

_"What didn't you get when I said I didn't want a relationship with __**you?**__ I never did and never will. You were just...look, Hermione and I are happy and despite what you think, she's perfect for me and will make the perfect Lady Malfoy. Now, I'm going to follow her lead and leave. What I said to you eight months ago still stands true. If I never see you again, it'll be too soon. We're over. Ta, Liza," he drawled mockingly and dissapparated. _

_"Oh, we are far from over Draco," Liza muttered before stomping away._

_She didn't notice was the figure that followed her out of the building until she heard 'Excuse me!' behind her and a hand gripped her upper arm; effectively stopping her in her tracks. _

* * *

_As soon as he opened the door to the suite the Ministry had put them up in and stepped in, he was thrown to the floor._

_"Fuck! What the hell, Granger? Were you waiting behind the door just so you could get at me the second I stepping inside?" _

_"Believe me Malfoy, that punch was nothing compared to what I was prepared to do to you. Now, tell me, what in Merlin's most baggy Y-fronts possessed you to announce that we are supposedly engaged? In a crowded hall no less! You do realise what you've done don't you?" she fumed. _

_Standing up from the floor and rubbing his bruised cheek, Draco started towards the mini-refrigerator to find some ice. He learned it seemed to work the best to stop the swelling and bruising. _

_"I needed to say something to get her away from me and it seemed like the best plan at the time. I didn't stop to think she would yell loud enough to announce everything to the entire Ministry."_

_Her glower was scary but that didn't stop his foot from taking its rightful place in his mouth as he added "besides, you went along with it. So technically, you're just as much at fault as I am."_

_Later, Draco would come to the conclusion that Voldemort had nothing on an angry Hermione. Meanwhile, he became a human target as the irate witch decided to show him why she had earned the title 'brightest witch of her age.' _

* * *

After what seemed like hours, Blaise wiped at the corner of his eye and took a swing of his glass of firewhiskey.

'I hope he chokes on his drink,' Draco though sadistically.

Pansy, on the other hand, continued to laugh her heart out. Draco had half a mind to chuck both of them out of the manor but restrained himself. He still needed their help.

"Mate, I knew Granger could be ruthless but I didn't know she had it in her_–_" and then the laughing started up again.

"While I am absolutely _thrilled_ that you two are having fun at my expense, would you kindly compose yourself enough to help me figure out just what I'm to tell my parents when they get back?" Draco practically shouted in frustration.

"Sorry Drake, but you do have to admit, it's fucking hilarious that_ –"_

"Can we please stop talking about it? It was humiliating enough living through it! I don't need you two dunces making me re-live it!"

Finally calming herself down, Pansy spoke up.

"We're sorry Draco. Truly. It was just a bit unexpected is all. But you can count on me to help you through this mess, I promise."

Draco managed a small smile of gratitude to the woman who was, for all intents and purposes, like a sister to him. Despite being brought up in a world where the word 'friend' was synonymous with 'lackey,' Draco, Blaise and Pansy had formed a tight friendship. Despite the lack of direct familial relation – although Draco was sure, given their ancestors had had a penchant for keeping their lines pure, they were probably distant something or another – the three were as close as siblings.

"And when he stops laughing, I'm sure Blaise will tell you he'll be more than happy to come up with a solution to your little problem with us...right?"

"Ss-sure I wi-ill," he Italian gasped out in between catching his breath. Finally calming down, he reached for the tumbler of firewhiskey again but Draco could still detect a glimmer of mischievousness in his mate's dark eyes.

"Anything for you mate, you know that."

When he didn't say anything more, Draco raised an eyebrow and shared a look with Pansy. Blaise just wasn't Blaise if he didn't manage to add in one last jab. He didn't disappoint.

"Besides, even if we can't come up with something, I'm sure all you have to do is point Granger her way and you and the blonde bitch can both sport matching bruises, warts and -" And he was off again.

Sighing, Pansy cuffed him in the back of his head and turned her attention to Draco.

"Ignore the buffoon, Draco. I can have a talk with Granger for you, so she'll know the harpy giving you trouble is the one responsible for this mess. She won't do anything to me."

Sighing deeply, Draco shook his head. He wasn't about to give Granger more fodder, or another target for her anger.

"Thanks Pans, but I can handle Granger. I was the one to promise her I would get things straightened out. Too bad I didn't think this would happen. We just have to focus on making sure we sort out this entire mess before Mother and Father return and find out that –"

"That apparently you and Ms. Granger have not only eloped but are expecting a child – that may or may not be yours- while another woman is also pregnant with your child?"

It was official. All the deities hated Draco and decided to team up to make his life as hard as possible. For in the doorway stood his parents, and neither one looked particularly happy.

* * *

**_Hi everyone! Thank you all for the reviews and alerts! I'll try to make more regular updates but I can't promise anything for sure since nothing ever works out like I plan. But I have made good headway in writing this story so I'll try my best. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy chapter 2!_**

**_-LittleEagle22_**


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